ARGH!

I'm totally unable to get organized. I know that's no surprise, but it only gets hard when I have to finish something by a certain deadline and just can't get it done. Suddenly there are thousands of things I just have to do because otherwise I forget them, and hey, I still have a week's time, and then day after day goes by and I still didn't work on my term paper. There's some big magical border, I swear. I can sit before my computer staring at the empty virtual sheet for an hour if it comes to that, not writing a single word; but then, just for a change (and because I don't do anything sensitive anyway, so hey) I open my old fantasy story and before I realize I wrote three pages. Maybe the story sucks, and maybe the three pages are full of crap, but I still wrote them while I can't write ONE for a term paper I really have to finish?! Please!
(Besides, it wouldn't even be that bad when I wrote 15 pages of crap - at least it would be something!) I don't even have all the books I need - stupid Culture Institute is closed all August and the library was closed on Friday when I arrived. I know that's my fault, I should have bothered earlier. Gnarf.
Ah well. I suppose it will work somehow. It always does. I always get away with things. That's why I am so unorganized. But sometimes I think I'm really not in my right mind most of the time. There are at least two planes - the theoretical plane ("You know you have to do this by Monday, so get going") and the actually acting plane ("It'll work, it'll work, I just have to draw this now or I'll forget").

Somehow, it'll probably work out. How? I don't know - it's a mystery...

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( ARGH auf deutsch )

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